Communication

Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High

The New York Times Bestseller!

Learn how to keep your cool and get the results you want when emotions flare.

When stakes are high, opinions vary, and emotions run strong, you have three choices: Avoid a crucial conversation and suffer the consequences; handle the conversation badly and suffer the consequences; or read Crucial Conversations and discover how to communicate best when it matters most. Crucial Conversations gives you the tools you need to step up to life's most difficult and important conversations, say what's on your mind, and achieve the positive resolutions you want. You'll learn how to:

• Prepare for high-impact situations with a six-minute mastery technique
• Make it safe to talk about almost anything
• Be persuasive, not abrasive
• Keep listening when others blow up or clam up
• Turn crucial conversations into the action and results you want

Whether they take place at work or at home, with your neighbors or your spouse, crucial conversations can have a profound impact on your career, your happiness, and your future. With the skills you learn in this book, you'll never have to worry about the outcome of a crucial conversation again.

Crucial Conversations offers readers a proven seven-point strategy for achieving their goals in all those emotionally, psychologically, or legally charged situations that can arise in their professional and personal lives.

Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss what Matters Most

We've all been there: We know we must confront a coworker, store clerk, or friend about some especially sticky situation--and we know the encounter will be uncomfortable. So we repeatedly mull it over until we can no longer put it off, and then finally stumble through the confrontation. Difficult Conversations, by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen, offers advice for handling these unpleasant exchanges in a manner that accomplishes their objective and diminishes the possibility that anyone will be needlessly hurt. The authors, associated with Harvard Law School and the Harvard Project on Negotiation, show how such dialogues actually comprise three separate components: the "what happened" conversation (verbalizing what we believe really was said and done), the "feelings" conversation (communicating and acknowledging each party's emotional impact), and the "identity" conversation (expressing the situation's underlying personal meaning). The explanations and suggested improvements are, admittedly, somewhat complicated. And they certainly don't guarantee positive results. But if you honestly are interested in elevating your communication skills, this book will walk you through both mistakes and remedies in a way that will boost your confidence when such unavoidable clashes arise. --Howard Rothman

Members of the Harvard Negotiation Project--which brought you the mega-bestseller Getting to YES--show you how to handle your most difficult conversations with confidence and skill.

Whether you're dealing with an underperforming employee, disagreeing with your spouse about money or child-rearing, negotiating with a difficult client, or simply saying "no," or "I'm sorry," or "I love you," we attempt or avoid difficult conversations every day. Based on fifteen years of research at the Harvard Negotiation Project, Difficult Conversations walks you through a step-by-step proven approach to having your toughest conversations with less stress and more success. You will learn:
how to start the conversation without defensiveness
why what is not said is as important as what is
ways of keeping and regaining your balance in the face of attacks and accusations
how to decipher the underlying structure of every difficult conversation

Filled with examples from everyday life, Difficult Conversations will help you on the job, at home, or out in the world. It is a book you will turn to again and again for advice, practical skills, and reassurance.

"Does this book deliver on [its] promise of an effective way through sticky situations, whether 'with your baby sitter or your biggest client'? It does."-- The New York Times

"These talented communicators blend a daunting array of disciplines into highly readable and practical advice."-- Booklist

"Brilliant. . . . I've already re-read most of it. I'm using it. What more could a reader ask?"-- Tom Peters

"Emotional Intelligence applied to life's tough moments."-- Daniel Goleman

"What is a difficult conversation? Asking for a raise. Ending a relationship. Saying ""no"" to your boss or spouse. Confronting disrespectful behavior. Apologizing. Conversations we dread, and often handle clumsily as a result, are part of all our lives: in boardrooms and family rooms, across the negotiation table and the dinner table. Now, Difficult Conversations teaches us how to handle these dialogues with more success and less anxiety. How does it work? Based on fifteen years of research and consultations with thousands of people, Difficult Conversations pinpoints what works. The authors discovered that regardless of context, the same small but crucial errors are what trip us up--and a few key adjustments can make all the difference. * The role of emotions--ours and theirs * The impact of what is said and what is not said * Why admitting our mistakes will put us in a stronger position * The truth behind the myth that women are better at expressing their emotions than men * How to respond productively in the face of personal attacks Who is this for? Filled with examples from everyday life, Difficult Conversations is certain to be an instant and lasting classic for families, neighbors, bosses, employees, customers, tenants, landlords, psychologists, teachers, and more. Who are the authors? Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen teach at Harvard Law School and at the Harvard Negotiation Project. They have consulted to countless businesspeople, governments, organizations, and communities including all parties to the negotiations on constitutional transition in South Africa; school teachers in Medellin, Colombia; and community leaders and the police department in Springfield, Massachusetts. They lecture throughout the world and have written on negotiation, conflict resolution, and communication. Bruce Patton is co-author of Getting to Yes."

Envisioning Information

A remarkable range of examples for the idea of visual thinking, with beautifully printed pages. A real treat for all who reason and learn by means of images. -- Rudolf Arnheim

People Skills: How to Assert Yourself, Listen to Others, and Resolve Conflicts

A wall of silent resentment shuts you off from someone you love....You listen to an argument in which neither party seems to hear the other....Your mind drifts to other matters when people talk to you....

People Skills is a communication-skills handbook that can help you eliminate these and other communication problems. Author Robert Bolton describes the twelve most common communication barriers, showing how these "roadblocks" damage relationships by increasing defensiveness, aggressiveness, or dependency. He explains how to acquire the ability to listen, assert yourself, resolve conflicts, and work out problems with others. These are skills that will help you communicate calmly, even in stressful emotionally charged situations.

People Skills will show you

* How to get your needs met using simple assertion techniques

* How body language often speaks louder than words

* How to use silence as a valuable communication tool

* How to de-escalate family disputes, lovers' quarrels, and other heated arguments

Both thought-provoking and practical, People Skills is filled with workable ideas that you can use to improve your communication in meaningful ways, every day.

Looking Out, Looking In

Used by more than a million students, LOOKING OUT, LOOKING IN, Twelfth Edition, continues its outstanding tradition of combining current information with a fun, reader-friendly voice that links course topics to your everyday life. You'll discover the reasons to improve your interpersonal skills and sharpen your critical understanding of the communication process through diverse and compelling examples that illustrate how communication skills can affect both the world around us and our own lives. Improve your relationships and your future career success, with the only text that offers the tools that have been proven to build better communication skills for almost 30 years!

WORDS THAT WORK: IT'S NOT WHAT YOU SAY, IT'S WHAT PEOPLE HEAR

The nation's premier communications expert shares his wisdom on how the words we choose can change the course of business, of politics, and of life in this countryIn Words That Work, Luntz offers a behind-the-scenes look at how the tactical use of words and phrases affects what we buy, who we vote for, and even what we believe in. With chapters like "The Ten Rules of Successful Communication" and "The 21 Words and Phrases for the 21st Century," he examines how choosing the right words is essential.Nobody is in a better position to explain than Frank Luntz: He has used his knowledge of words to help more than two dozen Fortune 500 companies grow. He'll tell us why Rupert Murdoch's six-billion-dollar decision to buy DirectTV was smart because satellite was more cutting edge than "digital cable," and why pharmaceutical companies transitioned their message from "treatment" to "prevention" and "wellness."If you ever wanted to learn how to talk your way out of a traffic ticket or talk your way into a raise, this book's for you.

You Just Don't Understand: Women and Men in Conversation

Women and men live in different worlds...made of different words.

Spending nearly four years on the New York Times bestseller list, including eight months at number one, You Just Don't Understand is a true cultural and intellectual phenomenon. This is the book that brought gender differences in ways of speaking to the forefront of public awareness. With a rare combination of scientific insight and delightful, humorous writing, Tannen shows why women and men can walk away from the same conversation with completely different impressions of what was said.

Studded with lively and entertaining examples of real conversations, this book gives you the tools to understand what went wrong -- and to find a common language in which to strengthen relationships at work and at home. A classic in the field of interpersonal relations, this book will change forever the way you approach conversations.

How to Say It For Women: Communicating with Confidence and Power Using the Language of Success

Phyllis Mindell, an acclaimed expert on professional communications, shows women how to transform themselves by transforming their language; shed weak words, phrases, and gestures; empower themselves to win attention and respect; and get their ideas across with confidence and power.

Perhaps the best teacher of how the power of language can transform is an unexpected one: Charlotte the spider of E.B. White's, Charlotte's Web. Mindell demonstrates how Charlotte communicated messages that gained national attention and saved a friend's life. As a model, she combines female strengths of wisdom and compassion with the determination and power to make a difference.

As part of Prentice Hall Press's highly successful How to Say It tm series, How to Say It tm for Women is packed with practical tips, techniques, and examples that arm women to grapple with every communication issue, from choosing the right word or sentence to speaking, reading, writing, leading, dressing, and interviewing effectively. Readers will learn how to: shun words that weaken messages and make women invisible; sail through interviews; assess and develop leadership skills; say NO, kindly but firmly; respond appropriately to slurs, insults, and harassment; say the one winning word that gets people to follow directions.

True stories about women in every field, along with quotes from Ruth Bader Ginsberg, Carla Hills, Amelia Earhart, Elizabeth Dole and others, enable women to tap the power of words to persuade, motivate, establish authority, and make a difference-- without sacrificing their integrity, their compassion, or their femininity.

The Fine Art of Small Talk: How To Start a Conversation, Keep It Going, Build Networking Skills -- and Leave a Positive Impression!

Nationally recognized communication expert Debra Fine reveals the techniques and strategies anyone can use to make small talkin any situation Do you spend an abnormal amount of time hiding out in the bathroom or hanging out at the buffet table at social gatherings? Does the thought of striking up a conversation with a stranger make your stomach do flip-flops? Do you sit nervously through job interviews waiting for the other person to speak? Are you a Nervous Ned or Nellie when it comes to networking? Then its time you mastered The Fine Art of Small Talk. With practical advice and conversation cheat sheets, The Fine Art of Small Talk will help you learn to feel more comfortable in any type of social situation, from lunch with the boss to an association event to a cocktail party where you dont know a soul.

Conversationally Speaking : Tested New Ways to Increase Your Personal and Social Effectiveness

More than a million people have learned the secrets of effective conversation using Conversationally Speaking. This revised edition provides more ways to improve conversational skills by asking questions that promote conversation, learning how to listen so that others will be encouraged to talk, reducing anxiety in social situations and more.